any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
