I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
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