my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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