Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
