i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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