Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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