By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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