Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
