Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
