Do you still have your period?
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
