we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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