Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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