its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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