Do you still have your period?
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
