You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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