So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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