No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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