Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
did i walk over a car last night?
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
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