I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
