I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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