Well apparently he's into motor boating.
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Mom said you looked used
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
