my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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