The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
