you guys were way drunker than both of me
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
