i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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