put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Randomize
