That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
