I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
