That's intense
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
