So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
