so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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