Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
