Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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