Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
