i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
