i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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