You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
