The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
