So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
