I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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