This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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