So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize