it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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