one might say we're banned from that church
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
