we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Randomize
