I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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