You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Randomize
