Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize
