you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
