Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize
